Most physicians lead with skill. Fewer lead with connection. Almost none were taught to do both well. That combination is the likable badass style highlighted in the book Likeable Badass by Alison Fragale. And it is the version of leadership that people trust, follow, and remember.

My Story
For most of my career, I walked into situations with guns blazing. I didn’t think of it as assertiveness. It was directness….efficiency…making sure the message landed so the team could move.

But in the push to get my point across, I sometimes skipped the human part. I didn’t always show my team that I cared about them, their experience, or the people we were serving. The intention was there. The connection wasn’t.

Reading Likeable Badass reframed this. Fragale’s research shows that warmth comes first. It builds trust and lowers defensiveness. Competence keeps people engaged once trust is established.

What also stood out to me was the permission to be yourself. You don’t have to copy someone else’s style. You don’t have to fake warmth or force assertiveness. You can use strategies that match your personality and still land in the “warm and competent” zone that great leaders operate in.

Actionable Tips

• Before any difficult conversation, take a 2-second pause to ground yourself so you don’t come in hot.
• Open with one sentence that acknowledges the person: “Tell me what you’re seeing.”
• Ask yourself, “What am I trying to accomplish and how do I want them to feel at the end?”
• Notice your default pattern: do you lead with clarity or warmth? Build the opposite muscle intentionally.
  

Why Likable Badass Leadership Works
Warmth and competence are not equal in how people perceive leaders. Psychologists consistently find that people judge warmth first. If they perceive warmth, they relax. If they don’t, everything else is interpreted through suspicion.

Competence still matters. But competence without warmth often feels abrasive or intimidating. Warmth without competence feels weak. The likable badass style blends both so your team trusts your judgment and feels safe speaking up.

Actionable Tips

• Add one sentence of purpose to every directive. “I want to make sure we're aligned for patient safety.”
• Watch your opening tone. A warm start buys a lot of goodwill for a direct message.
• Use body language intentionally: eye contact, a nod, or leaning in for the first few seconds.
• Replace assumptions with questions: “What made this challenging today?”

What Likable Badass Leadership Looks Like in Practice

Likable badasses lead with clarity and care. They are direct without being harsh. They ask questions without feeling insecure. They use relational framing instead of positional authority. They show warmth in a way that fits them, not someone else’s template.

Actionable Tips

• Start with curiosity: “Walk me through your thinking.”
• Use relational framing: “Here’s why this matters for our team and our patients.”
• Give direct feedback with partnership: “I’m sharing this because I want you to succeed and I know you can.”
• Show warmth in a way that feels natural: gratitude, perspective taking, validation, or shared goals.

Why This Matters in Academic Medicine
Academic medicine over-indexes on competence. People move fast. Decisions are high stakes. Communication breakdowns carry real risk.

In this environment, warmth isn’t soft. It is protective. It increases psychological safety. It encourages early escalation. It improves retention. The combination of warmth and competence is exactly what early-career physicians look for in leaders.

Actionable Tips

• Start rounds, meetings, or difficult discussions with one sentence of human connection.
• When setting expectations, link the task directly to mission, safety, or workflow.
• When you need information, ask open-ended questions instead of yes-or-no questions.
• When tensions rise, slow your pace slightly. Speed often reads as impatience.

Final Thought
The likable badass style isn’t about correcting your personality. It’s about upgrading your mindset. 

Start seeing leadership as an interaction you shape, not a role you perform. 

Warmth and competence are skills you can strengthen with intention. 

The more you practice curiosity, connection, and grounded directness, the more influence you build across your team, your department, and your career. 

Think about who you want to be as a leader a year from now and what habits you need to start today. 

That future version of you is created by the mindset you choose every single day.